Arjuna's Despair

दृष्ट्वा तु पाण्डवानीकं व्यूढं दुर्योधनस्तदा ।आचार्यमुपसंगम्य राजा वचनमब्रवीत् ॥

dṛṣṭvā tu pāṇḍavānīkaṃ vyūḍhaṃ duryodhanastadā |ācāryamupasaṃgamya rājā vacanamabravīt ||

Sanjaya said: Seeing the Pandava army drawn up for battle, King Duryodhana went to his teacher Drona and spoke these words.

पश्यैतां पाण्डुपुत्राणामाचार्य महतीं चमूम् ।व्यूढां द्रुपदपुत्रेण तव शिष्येण धीमता ॥

paśyaitāṃ pāṇḍuputrāṇāmācārya mahatīṃ camūm |vyūḍhāṃ drupadaputreṇa tava śiṣyeṇa dhīmatā ||

Teacher, look at this mighty army of the sons of Pandu, arranged by your own clever pupil, the son of Drupada.

अत्र शूरा महेष्वासा भीमार्जुनसमा युधि ।युयुधानो विराटश्च द्रुपदश्च महारथः ॥

atra śūrā maheṣvāsā bhīmārjunasamā yudhi |yuyudhāno virāṭaśca drupadaśca mahārathaḥ ||

In it are heroes and great archers, equal in battle to Bhima and Arjuna: Yuyudhana, Virata and Drupada, a great chariot-warrior.

धृष्टकेतुश्चेकितानः काशिराजश्च वीर्यवान् ।पुरुजित्कुन्तिभोजश्च शैब्यश्च नरपुङ्गवः ॥

dhṛṣṭaketuścekitānaḥ kāśirājaśca vīryavān |purujitkuntibhojaśca śaibyaśca narapuṅgavaḥ ||

There are Dhrishtaketu, Chekitana and the brave king of Kashi, as well as Purujit, Kuntibhoja and Shaibya, the best of men.

युधामन्युश्च विक्रान्त उत्तमौजाश्च वीर्यवान् ।सौभद्रो द्रौपदेयाश्च सर्व एव महारथाः ॥

yudhāmanyuśca vikrānta uttamaujāśca vīryavān |saubhadro draupadeyāśca sarva eva mahārathāḥ ||

There are also mighty Yudhamanyu, brave Uttamaujas, the son of Subhadra and the sons of Draupadi, all of them great chariot-warriors.

अस्माकं तु विशिष्टा ये तान्निबोध द्विजोत्तम ।नायका मम सैन्यस्य संज्ञार्थं तान्ब्रवीमि ते ॥

asmākaṃ tu viśiṣṭā ye tānnibodha dvijottama |nāyakā mama sainyasya saṃjñārthaṃ tānbravīmi te ||

Now hear, best of the twice-born, the leading warriors on our own side. I name the commanders of my army for you.

भवान्भीष्मश्च कर्णश्च कृपश्च समितिंजयः ।अश्वत्थामा विकर्णश्च सौमदत्तिस्तथैव च ॥

bhavānbhīṣmaśca karṇaśca kṛpaśca samitiṃjayaḥ |aśvatthāmā vikarṇaśca saumadattistathaiva ca ||

There are you yourself, Bhishma, Karna, Kripa who wins battles, Ashvatthama, Vikarna and the son of Somadatta.

अन्ये च बहवः शूरा मदर्थे त्यक्तजीविताः ।नानाशस्त्रप्रहरणाः सर्वे युद्धविशारदाः ॥

anye ca bahavaḥ śūrā madarthe tyaktajīvitāḥ |nānāśastrapraharaṇāḥ sarve yuddhaviśāradāḥ ||

And many other heroes are ready to give their lives for my sake. They carry many kinds of weapons and are all skilled in war.

अपर्याप्तं तदस्माकं बलं भीष्माभिरक्षितम् ।पर्याप्तं त्विदमेतेषां बलं भीमाभिरक्षितम् ॥

aparyāptaṃ tadasmākaṃ balaṃ bhīṣmābhirakṣitam |paryāptaṃ tvidameteṣāṃ balaṃ bhīmābhirakṣitam ||

Our army, guarded by Bhishma, is beyond measure, while their army, guarded by Bhima, is limited.

अयनेषु च सर्वेषु यथाभागमवस्थिताः ।भीष्ममेवाभिरक्षन्तु भवन्तः सर्व एव हि ॥

ayaneṣu ca sarveṣu yathābhāgamavasthitāḥ |bhīṣmamevābhirakṣantu bhavantaḥ sarva eva hi ||

So all of you, standing firm in your places at every entry point of the ranks, must protect Bhishma above all.

तस्य संजनयन्हर्षं कुरुवृद्धः पितामहः ।सिंहनादं विनद्योच्चैः शङ्खं दध्मौ प्रतापवान् ॥

tasya saṃjanayanharṣaṃ kuruvṛddhaḥ pitāmahaḥ |siṃhanādaṃ vinadyoccaiḥ śaṅkhaṃ dadhmau pratāpavān ||

Then, to cheer Duryodhana, the aged grandsire Bhishma, eldest of the Kurus, gave a lion's roar and blew his conch loudly.

ततः शङ्खाश्च भेर्यश्च पणवानकगोमुखाः ।सहसैवाभ्यहन्यन्त स शब्दस्तुमुलोऽभवत् ॥

tataḥ śaṅkhāśca bheryaśca paṇavānakagomukhāḥ |sahasaivābhyahanyanta sa śabdastumulo'bhavat ||

At once conches, kettledrums, drums and horns all sounded together, and the noise was tremendous.

ततः श्वेतैर्हयैर्युक्ते महति स्यन्दने स्थितौ ।माधवः पाण्डवश्चैव दिव्यौ शङ्खौ प्रदध्मतुः ॥

tataḥ śvetairhayairyukte mahati syandane sthitau |mādhavaḥ pāṇḍavaścaiva divyau śaṅkhau pradadhmatuḥ ||

Then Krishna and Arjuna, standing in their great chariot yoked to white horses, blew their divine conches.

पाञ्चजन्यं हृषीकेशो देवदत्तं धनञ्जयः ।पौण्ड्रं दध्मौ महाशङ्खं भीमकर्मा वृकोदरः ॥

pāñcajanyaṃ hṛṣīkeśo devadattaṃ dhanañjayaḥ |pauṇḍraṃ dadhmau mahāśaṅkhaṃ bhīmakarmā vṛkodaraḥ ||

Krishna blew the conch Panchajanya, Arjuna blew Devadatta, and Bhima, known for mighty deeds, blew the great conch Paundra.

अनन्तविजयं राजा कुन्तीपुत्रो युधिष्ठिरः ।नकुलः सहदेवश्च सुघोषमणिपुष्पकौ ॥

anantavijayaṃ rājā kuntīputro yudhiṣṭhiraḥ |nakulaḥ sahadevaśca sughoṣamaṇipuṣpakau ||

King Yudhishthira, son of Kunti, blew Anantavijaya, and Nakula and Sahadeva blew Sughosha and Manipushpaka.

काश्यश्च परमेष्वासः शिखण्डी च महारथः ।धृष्टद्युम्नो विराटश्च सात्यकिश्चापराजितः ॥

kāśyaśca parameṣvāsaḥ śikhaṇḍī ca mahārathaḥ |dhṛṣṭadyumno virāṭaśca sātyakiścāparājitaḥ ||

The king of Kashi, a fine archer, the great chariot-warrior Shikhandi, Dhrishtadyumna, Virata and the unbeaten Satyaki,

द्रुपदो द्रौपदेयाश्च सर्वशः पृथिवीपते ।सौभद्रश्च महाबाहुः शङ्खान्दध्मुः पृथक्पृथक् ॥

drupado draupadeyāśca sarvaśaḥ pṛthivīpate |saubhadraśca mahābāhuḥ śaṅkhāndadhmuḥ pṛthakpṛthak ||

Drupada, the sons of Draupadi and the strong-armed son of Subhadra, all blew their own conches, O king.

स घोषो धार्तराष्ट्राणां हृदयानि व्यदारयत् ।नभश्च पृथिवीं चैव तुमुलो व्यनुनादयन् ॥

sa ghoṣo dhārtarāṣṭrāṇāṃ hṛdayāni vyadārayat |nabhaśca pṛthivīṃ caiva tumulo vyanunādayan ||

That great noise, echoing through earth and sky, tore at the hearts of Dhritarashtra's sons.

अथ व्यवस्थितान्दृष्ट्वा धार्तराष्ट्रान्कपिध्वजः ।प्रवृत्ते शस्त्रसंपाते धनुरुद्यम्य पाण्डवः ॥

atha vyavasthitāndṛṣṭvā dhārtarāṣṭrānkapidhvajaḥ |pravṛtte śastrasaṃpāte dhanurudyamya pāṇḍavaḥ ||

Then Arjuna, whose banner bore the image of Hanuman, saw Dhritarashtra's sons standing in order. As the weapons were about to clash, he lifted his bow,

हृषीकेशं तदा वाक्यमिदमाह महीपते ।सेनयोरुभयोर्मध्ये रथं स्थापय मेऽच्युत ॥

hṛṣīkeśaṃ tadā vākyamidamāha mahīpate |senayorubhayormadhye rathaṃ sthāpaya me'cyuta ||

and spoke to Krishna: Arjuna said, Achyuta, please place my chariot between the two armies,

यावदेतान्निरिक्षेऽहं योद्‌धुकामानवस्थितान् ।कैर्मया सह योद्धव्यमस्मिन् रणसमुद्यमे ॥

yāvadetānnirikṣe'haṃ yoddhukāmānavasthitān |kairmayā saha yoddhavyamasmin raṇasamudyame ||

so that I may see those who stand here eager for battle, and know whom I must fight in this war.

योत्स्यमानानवेक्षेऽहं य एतेऽत्र समागताः ।धार्तराष्ट्रस्य दुर्बुद्धेर्युद्धे प्रियचिकीर्षवः ॥

yotsyamānānavekṣe'haṃ ya ete'tra samāgatāḥ |dhārtarāṣṭrasya durbuddheryuddhe priyacikīrṣavaḥ ||

I want to look at those who have gathered here to fight, wishing to please the ill-minded son of Dhritarashtra.

एवमुक्तो हृषीकेशो गुडाकेशेन भारत ।सेनयोरुभयोर्मध्ये स्थापयित्वा रथोत्तमम् ॥

evamukto hṛṣīkeśo guḍākeśena bhārata |senayorubhayormadhye sthāpayitvā rathottamam ||

Sanjaya said: O king, when Arjuna spoke this way, Krishna drove the finest of chariots and stopped it between the two armies,

भीष्मद्रोणप्रमुखतः सर्वेषां च महीक्षिताम् ।उवाच पार्थ पश्यैतान्समवेतान्कुरूनिति ॥

bhīṣmadroṇapramukhataḥ sarveṣāṃ ca mahīkṣitām |uvāca pārtha paśyaitānsamavetānkurūniti ||

facing Bhishma, Drona and all the kings, and said: Arjuna, look at all these Kurus gathered here.

तत्रापश्यत्स्थितान्पार्थः पितॄनथ पितामहान् ।आचार्यान्मातुलान्भ्रातॄन्पुत्रान्पौत्रान्सखींस्तथा ॥

tatrāpaśyatsthitānpārthaḥ pitṝnatha pitāmahān |ācāryānmātulānbhrātṝnputrānpautrānsakhīṃstathā ||

There Arjuna saw, standing in both armies, fathers and grandfathers, teachers, uncles, brothers, sons, grandsons and friends,

श्वशुरान्सुहृदश्चैव सेनयोरुभयोरपि ।तान्समीक्ष्य स कौन्तेयः सर्वान्बन्धूनवस्थितान् ॥

śvaśurānsuhṛdaścaiva senayorubhayorapi |tānsamīkṣya sa kaunteyaḥ sarvānbandhūnavasthitān ||

as well as fathers-in-law and well-wishers. Seeing all these relatives lined up,

कृपया परयाविष्टो विषीदन्निदमब्रवीत् ।दृष्ट्वेमं स्वजनं कृष्ण युयुत्सुं समुपस्थितम् ॥

kṛpayā parayāviṣṭo viṣīdannidamabravīt |dṛṣṭvemaṃ svajanaṃ kṛṣṇa yuyutsuṃ samupasthitam ||

Arjuna was filled with deep pity and said sadly: Krishna, when I see my own people standing here eager to fight,

सीदन्ति मम गात्राणि मुखं च परिशुष्यति ।वेपथुश्च शरीरे मे रोमहर्षश्च जायते ॥

sīdanti mama gātrāṇi mukhaṃ ca pariśuṣyati |vepathuśca śarīre me romaharṣaśca jāyate ||

my limbs give way, my mouth goes dry, my body trembles and my hair stands on end.

गाण्डीवं स्रंसते हस्तात्त्वक्चैव परिदह्यते ।न च शक्नोम्यवस्थातुं भ्रमतीव च मे मनः ॥

gāṇḍīvaṃ sraṃsate hastāttvakcaiva paridahyate |na ca śaknomyavasthātuṃ bhramatīva ca me manaḥ ||

My bow Gandiva slips from my hand and my skin is burning. I cannot stand steady, and my mind seems to be spinning.

निमित्तानि च पश्यामि विपरीतानि केशव ।न च श्रेयोऽनुपश्यामि हत्वा स्वजनमाहवे ॥

nimittāni ca paśyāmi viparītāni keśava |na ca śreyo'nupaśyāmi hatvā svajanamāhave ||

I see bad signs, Keshava, and I see no good in killing my own kin in battle.

न काङ्क्षे विजयं कृष्ण न च राज्यं सुखानि च ।किं नो राज्येन गोविन्द किं भोगैर्जीवितेन वा ॥

na kāṅkṣe vijayaṃ kṛṣṇa na ca rājyaṃ sukhāni ca |kiṃ no rājyena govinda kiṃ bhogairjīvitena vā ||

I do not want victory, Krishna, nor a kingdom, nor pleasures. What use to us is a kingdom, or enjoyment, or even life itself, Govinda?

येषामर्थे काङ्क्षितं नो राज्यं भोगाः सुखानि च ।त इमेऽवस्थिता युद्धे प्राणांस्त्यक्त्वा धनानि च ॥

yeṣāmarthe kāṅkṣitaṃ no rājyaṃ bhogāḥ sukhāni ca |ta ime'vasthitā yuddhe prāṇāṃstyaktvā dhanāni ca ||

The very people for whose sake we wanted a kingdom, enjoyment and pleasures now stand here in battle, ready to give up their lives and wealth:

आचार्याः पितरः पुत्रास्तथैव च पितामहाः ।मातुलाः श्वशुराः पौत्राः श्यालाः संबन्धिनस्तथा ॥

ācāryāḥ pitaraḥ putrāstathaiva ca pitāmahāḥ |mātulāḥ śvaśurāḥ pautrāḥ śyālāḥ saṃbandhinastathā ||

teachers, fathers, sons and grandfathers, uncles, fathers-in-law, grandsons, brothers-in-law and other relatives.

एतान्न हन्तुमिच्छामि घ्नतोऽपि मधुसूदन ।अपि त्रैलोक्यराज्यस्य हेतोः किं नु महीकृते ॥

etānna hantumicchāmi ghnato'pi madhusūdana |api trailokyarājyasya hetoḥ kiṃ nu mahīkṛte ||

Even if they kill me, Madhusudana, I do not wish to kill them, not even for rule over the three worlds, much less for this earth.

निहत्य धार्तराष्ट्रान्नः का प्रीतिः स्याज्जनार्दन ।पापमेवाश्रयेदस्मान्हत्वैतानाततायिनः ॥

nihatya dhārtarāṣṭrānnaḥ kā prītiḥ syājjanārdana |pāpamevāśrayedasmānhatvaitānātatāyinaḥ ||

What joy could we have from killing the sons of Dhritarashtra, Janardana? Even though they are aggressors, only sin would fall on us if we kill them.

तस्मान्नार्हा वयं हन्तुं धार्तराष्ट्रान्स्वबान्धवान् ।स्वजनं हि कथं हत्वा सुखिनः स्याम माधव ॥

tasmānnārhā vayaṃ hantuṃ dhārtarāṣṭrānsvabāndhavān |svajanaṃ hi kathaṃ hatvā sukhinaḥ syāma mādhava ||

So it is not right for us to kill the sons of Dhritarashtra, our own relatives. How can we be happy after killing our own people, Madhava?

यद्यप्येते न पश्यन्ति लोभोपहतचेतसः ।कुलक्षयकृतं दोषं मित्रद्रोहे च पातकम् ॥

yadyapyete na paśyanti lobhopahatacetasaḥ |kulakṣayakṛtaṃ doṣaṃ mitradrohe ca pātakam ||

Even if they, blinded by greed, see no wrong in destroying a family and no sin in betraying friends,

कथं न ज्ञेयमस्माभिः पापादस्मान्निवर्तितुम् ।कुलक्षयकृतं दोषं प्रपश्यद्भिर्जनार्दन ॥

kathaṃ na jñeyamasmābhiḥ pāpādasmānnivartitum |kulakṣayakṛtaṃ doṣaṃ prapaśyadbhirjanārdana ||

why should we, who clearly see the harm in destroying a family, not know enough to turn away from this sin, Janardana?

कुलक्षये प्रणश्यन्ति कुलधर्माः सनातनाः ।धर्मे नष्टे कुलं कृत्स्नमधर्मोऽभिभवत्युत ॥

kulakṣaye praṇaśyanti kuladharmāḥ sanātanāḥ |dharme naṣṭe kulaṃ kṛtsnamadharmo'bhibhavatyuta ||

When a family is destroyed, its age-old family traditions of dharma are lost. When dharma is lost, adharma, the lack of right order, takes over the whole family.

अधर्माभिभवात्कृष्ण प्रदुष्यन्ति कुलस्त्रियः ।स्त्रीषु दुष्टासु वार्ष्णेय जायते वर्णसंकरः ॥

adharmābhibhavātkṛṣṇa praduṣyanti kulastriyaḥ |strīṣu duṣṭāsu vārṣṇeya jāyate varṇasaṃkaraḥ ||

When adharma spreads, Krishna, the women of the family go astray, and when that happens, Varshneya, a mixing of varnas, the social orders, arises.

संकरो नरकायैव कुलघ्नानां कुलस्य च ।पतन्ति पितरो ह्येषां लुप्तपिण्डोदकक्रियाः ॥

saṃkaro narakāyaiva kulaghnānāṃ kulasya ca |patanti pitaro hyeṣāṃ luptapiṇḍodakakriyāḥ ||

This mixing drags both the family and those who destroyed it to hell, and their ancestors fall too, since the offerings of rice-balls and water to them stop.

दोषैरेतैः कुलघ्नानां वर्णसंकरकारकैः ।उत्साद्यन्ते जातिधर्माः कुलधर्माश्च शाश्वताः ॥

doṣairetaiḥ kulaghnānāṃ varṇasaṃkarakārakaiḥ |utsādyante jātidharmāḥ kuladharmāśca śāśvatāḥ ||

Through these wrongs of the family-destroyers, which cause the mixing of varnas, the lasting duties of community and family are destroyed.

उत्सन्नकुलधर्माणां मनुष्याणां जनार्दन ।नरकेऽनियतं वासो भवतीत्यनुशुश्रुम ॥

utsannakuladharmāṇāṃ manuṣyāṇāṃ janārdana |narake'niyataṃ vāso bhavatītyanuśuśruma ||

We have heard, Janardana, that people whose family duties are destroyed live in hell for a long time.

अहो बत महत्पापं कर्तुं व्यवसिता वयम् ।यद्राज्यसुखलोभेन हन्तुं स्वजनमुद्यताः ॥

aho bata mahatpāpaṃ kartuṃ vyavasitā vayam |yadrājyasukhalobhena hantuṃ svajanamudyatāḥ ||

Alas, how strange that we have set out to commit a great sin, ready to kill our own people out of greed for the pleasures of a kingdom.

यदि मामप्रतीकारमशस्त्रं शस्त्रपाणयः ।धार्तराष्ट्रा रणे हन्युस्तन्मे क्षेमतरं भवेत् ॥

yadi māmapratīkāramaśastraṃ śastrapāṇayaḥ |dhārtarāṣṭrā raṇe hanyustanme kṣemataraṃ bhavet ||

It would be better for me if the sons of Dhritarashtra, weapons in hand, killed me in battle while I stood unarmed and did not fight back.